• So you killed him with what now?""I tried that Dr. Phil book at first"..."And I finished it off with the toilet seat. Just so you know, you left it up again. That drives me crazy

    Jesse Petersen
  • Support your partner in their interests. You never know when batting practice, kung fu movie moves, or even a poker night might come in handy during a zombie infestation

    Jesse Petersen
  • Make requests, not demands. "Please" kill that zombie, honey, I'm out of bullets

    Jesse Petersen
  • Build mutual friendships. Just be ready to end them when your friends start trying to eat you

    Jesse Petersen
  • And then, anger gave way to pure and simple job satisfaction. I mean, when I looked at a dead zombie head on a spike, I thought, "Hey, I did that. Picasso would have been proud. Especially how I rearranged that eye

    Jesse Petersen
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